Grounding Techniques: The Quiet Skill That Got Us Through the Hardest Moments

If I’m honest, grounding wasn’t something I chose to learn.
It was something I needed.

Long before courses, labels, or lead magnets, grounding became part of our everyday life when my daughter was still in her early teens. Not in calm therapy rooms, but in restaurants, car parks, queues, cafés, and places where leaving wasn’t always an option.

Because life doesn’t pause for emotional overwhelm.
And neither do panic, pain, or dysregulation.

What grounding really is (and what it isn’t)

Let’s clear something up first.

Grounding is not:

• Telling someone to “calm down”

• Forcing breathing exercises when they’re already overwhelmed

• A magic fix that makes emotions disappear

Grounding is:

• Helping the nervous system feel safer

• Bringing someone back into the present moment

• Reducing overwhelm enough to cope with what’s happening

It works for:

• Anxiety and panic

• Emotional dysregulation

• Trauma responses

• Physical pain

• Meltdowns and shutdowns

• Even moments of intense anger, yours or theirs

And crucially…

⚓It works for parents too.

The reality: using grounding in real life, not ideal conditions

Most grounding advice sounds great on paper.

But when you’re:

• Halfway through a meal

• In public

• Already exhausted

• Watching your child spiral

• Or trying not to lose your own temper

…you don’t need perfection.
You need practical.

I’ve used grounding techniques:

• Sitting in restaurants, quietly naming objects at the table

• In toilets, running cold water over wrists

• In cars, counting breaths together

• In waiting rooms, focusing on sounds instead of thoughts

Sometimes silently.
Sometimes side by side.
Sometimes just for me while I stayed outwardly calm.

Because here’s the truth most parents don’t hear enough:

You don’t ground at your child.
You ground with them or for them.

“Why am I getting cross when they’re the one struggling?”

This is one of the hardest parts and one of the most important.

Parents often feel:

• Snappy

• Irritated

• Overwhelmed

• Guilty for feeling frustrated

And then guilty again for feeling guilty.

What’s really happening is this:
Your nervous system is under threat too.

When your child is dysregulated:

• Your body goes into fight, flight, or freeze

• Your patience shortens

• Your thinking narrows

• Your tone changes (even when you try)

Grounding isn’t just about helping them calm down.
It’s about keeping you regulated enough to respond rather than react.

That alone can change everything.

Grounding beyond mental health

One of the most misunderstood things about grounding is that it’s often seen as “just for anxiety”.

It isn’t.

Grounding can help with:

• Chronic pain flares

• Sensory overload

• Emotional overwhelm

• Trauma responses

• Anger and shutdown

• Even moments of grief or numbness

It gives the brain a break from constant scanning for danger.

And sometimes, that pause is enough to get through the next five minutes, which is often all we’re aiming for.

Why simple tools matter more than perfect ones

When things are hard, complexity doesn’t help.

What does help:

• Short tools

• Familiar techniques

• Options you can use anywhere

• Exercises that don’t draw attention

• Things that don’t rely on “doing it right”

That’s exactly why I created my 50 Grounding Tools.

Not as a clinical guide.
Not as something to “study”.
But as a grab and go resource for real life.

A gentle place to start

If you’re reading this as:

• A mum

• A partner

• A parent who’s exhausted

• Someone supporting a loved one through emotional storms

Please know this:

You are not failing because things still feel hard.
You are learning skills most people are never taught.

And grounding is one of the most powerful places to begin.

⚓You can download my free Grounding Tools guide here:

https://chaos-to-calm.org.uk/50groundingtools

It’s designed to:

• Be easy to dip into

• Work in public and private

• Support you as much as the person you’re helping

Because calmer moments aren’t about doing more,
they’re about having the right tools when it matters most.

Your calm in the chaos,
Sami ⚓💙